Author Archives: loradayton

What’s coming in August…

I’ve been rather busy with, as Officer Friendly Rark Grames says: stuff and thangs. You know the usual: work, pandemic, existential dread…

Anyway. So! Here is a quick list of what is going to go down, hopefully, during the month of August:

  • Feedee survey result discussions (expect several)
  • A new story!
  • Some more feminist ranty goodness from me 🙂 I don’t want to quite give it away just yet, but my list of blog topics and outlines are burgeoning more than waistbands at Thanksgiving bash.

And most importantly…

I’m doing a story giveaway!

Basically yeah, it’s totally a grab to get more blog subscribers (so I don’t have to run a mailing list) and keep my titles ranking on Amazon. I am working on getting Smashwords and other markets ready but formatting is a bitch and I hate it, that’s really the thing holding that up. But the upside is that if you do that, you might get a chance to basically get a free commission from me! That’s pretty awesome, right? Right!

If everything goes well I could very well do these more often!

While I was developing this giveaway, I unfortunately found out that the Jetpack blog subscription doo-hickey does not work at all with Gmail users. At. All. So I will be replacing it until WordPress can figure it out and fix it. It sucks and I’m not happy about it but that’s the way it goes. So if you subscribe to the blog using gmail, I have to manually add you and then you have to activate the invitation. This would not be an issue so much if it was, say, Yahoo causing the problems… but Gmail? Ugh.

If you subscribed to the blog using gmail and never got a confirmation, please submit again here and I’ll send you the confirmation again. Sorry 😦

Why Serial Deleters are Reviled and What You Can Do About It

Do you “come and go” from these communities? This is for you.

Scrolling through feedist networks and forums, a common theme rings out as people discuss their experiences: those who serially delete their profiles only to return again within days, weeks, or even months, are not appreciated and avoided at all costs. At the very least, they are not trusted. Spoken about with disdain and dismissed.

Those who serially delete their profiles generally fall into three categories:

  1. Not ready or able to be fully present and authentic in the community. In short, these people are ashamed or afraid of or confused by their desires and what that means for their lives. This does not mean they have bad intentions but are not yet prepared for the consequences of their actions.

  2. Abusers, manipulators, and others actively seeking to objectify people. These are the cheaters, the incels, and everything between. By and large they also experience intense insecurity as those in the first category but they choose to target others to let out their bad feelings.

  3. Victims and others escaping those in the second category. These don’t count and won’t be part of the discussion today.

The two types are more of a spectrum and they are not mutually exclusive although most tend lean heavily toward one or the other.

If they delete because they’re unavailable, what’s the big deal?

One may think it’s not a big deal and scratch their heads as to why so many that remain present and active in the community get frustrated by this behavior. But… it’s really not that easy.

Those of us that remain active in the community do so specifically to build relationships. That could be friendships, networking, romance, casual, or even just our relationships with ourselves—as many of us who are fat simply need support and camaraderie from others with similar experiences and feelings. Serial deleters who waltz in and consume us like commodities; our attention; our time; our energy; our emotions… are taxing.

The frustration comes less from the fact they disappeared without warning and moreso the knowledge that we can’t stop them from doing it. They can and likely will do it again… and again… and again. It’s one thing if a person is upfront that they are only there for a brief chat or otherwise indicate their ephemeral lifestyle in early conversations or on their profiles, but the vast majority do not do this.

We already live in a world that literally wishes death upon fat people. The fat kink space is already phobic and toxic, and it’s an extra layer of piss icing on a shit cake when people pretend to care about you only to disappear without a trace. There is especially something painful about hitting it off with someone, believing they have any interest in you as a person only to demonstrate they won’t even treat you like one in the end. No two ways about it, it’s a form of objectification and fetishization that benefits no one in the long run.

And the truth is that they really aren’t anything special or unique. We already have a word for that: ghosting. Serial profile deleters are ghosts.

We have to have thick skin (literally…) to exist in this world, and most can understand that ghosting is not about the ghostee but the ghost-er. But it does not mean there is no impact on the person left behind: regardless if someone is a category 1 or 2 ghoster, the message they send by treating people in this way is that they are not even worth a simple send-off. It leaves the ghostee wondering if they were just a figure of entertainment, lust, and fantasy, or if the ghost was just too scared to admit they are facing their collective internal and external fatphobia and seeing us as actual human beings for the first time.

It sucks and it hurts, every single time.

Uh oh… I think I’m one of those. What do I do?

Well… stop deleting your profile. I can’t know your particular situation and won’t pass moral judgment. I’m personally a believer that if they want to, people can change and that poor behavior does not necessarily mean they are a bad person. I’ll err on the side of cautious optimism that if you’ve made it all the way here, it means that perhaps you know this is not the best course of action and want to correct it.

Here are some actionable things you can do:

  • Get out of whatever situation you’re in that prevents you from being present and available. Trust me—we’ve seen it all. We know when you’re sneaking around on a partner or hiding the fact you have a kid. We know. If you truly feel as though that this is what you want, you absolutely deserve it. But if something is stopping you from being able to pursue it, such as an unsatisfying relationship, those fleeting moments typing sweet nothings in private messages will not give you that freedom to be yourself. You deserve better, your partner or family deserves better, and we deserve better.

  • Be honest. There isn’t a single way you can hide what’s going on. We will know. One way or another. There’s a difference between not sharing personal details for the sake of anonymity, vulnerability, and privacy, and then there’s hiding a huge detail like whoopsies, forgot to tell you about my partner I’m deceiving!

  • Re-establish yourself as someone trustworthy. If you’re cheating on a partner to poke around here, it’s never innocent. You’re also communicating ahead of time to this community that you’ll deceive them, a group of people that are regularly used, deceived, abused, and objectified by our own insiders and the rest of the world. You will have to invest heavily with the community, be transparent, and basically change your behavior. That’s a genuine apology.

  • If you feel as though you must flee: consider simply deactivating notifications and clearing out your profile, but don’t delete it. We all need a break sometimes or just taper off as other things about life sweep us off in its current. That’s normal and okay. Personally, when I have those moments, I simply indicate on my profiles that I’m on a break or hiatus and will send off a message to a few friends. I log out and forget about it for awhile until I’m ready to return.

That’s a lot…

I’m not here to tell you how to live your life. I’m just saying that if you are more of a category 1 feedist ghoster, it’s in your best interest to recalibrate your modus operandi. Your individual comfort and thoughts simply don’t change the fact that you are using people by deleting and leaving without warning and that it does impact them. Do you want fat, fat-positive, and feedist people in your life? Then stop treating them as disposable. Stick around long enough and people will want you in theirs, too.

Thank you for reading my post today! If you enjoyed it, you may also be interested in my erotica or even a commission.

Some upcoming stories!

I’ve got a few drafts and outlines going right now and can’t wait to finish these! Just an idea of what will be coming from me shortly, though the titles and synopses may change by the time they’re published. What do you think of these?

Going Ham

A feeder has finally finished a basement renovation project to better fatten their feedees. Toys, machines, all manner of fun restraints and props! In its debut run, a longtime play couple really break it in and test it out.

The Investigation

The wife of a wealthy and well-connected business owner completely disappears one day. To avoid the the attention of the police (and media) Carol hires a private investigator to find out what happened. Her wife is tracked down but has gone through unbelievable changes. Carol doesn’t know what to make of it—was she captured or did she choose to leave?

Statute of Limitations

The FDA has become the most powerful organization in the United States government. Through a series of complicated legislative actions, a loophole has now mandated minimum body mass index. Health and diet education usually keeps most up to code, but a few deliberately evade inspections and exams. Much like the IRS, the FDA finds everyone eventually.

Thank you for reading my post today! If you enjoyed it, you may also be interested in my erotica or even a commission.

FAQ: Why Body Inflation? Basically—Weird Bondage

I figured out a reason why I like body inflation so much. And while it’s a fairly common shared kink amongst feedists, it doesn’t always appeal completely across the board. So, sometimes, curious FAs will inquire why it is I like it so much, especially when they discover that it was my first big kink long before feedism came about.

While the medium doesn’t really matter—air, gas, liquid, or something creative—I tried to get to the root of it and figure out exactly what it is that gets me.

When it comes to inflation erotica, whether it is fiction or visual art, I really love the process of inflation. Of course the end stage is just as fun, but for many who enjoy things like rapid weight gain, tight clothes, and popping buttons—inflation offers a lot of that by default.

But always, my favorite moment is when an inflatee realizes whether by choice or circumstance that they are no longer independently mobile or ambulatory. In stories and sequences, I prefer they end on an open note or one in which popping isn’t implied, because for me, it’s the immobility that gets to me. Just like bondage.

And then it dawned on me that it’s the inverse of a vacuum bed. Instead of being sucked into a frame, inflatees are basically turned into the opposite of a vacuum frame and immobilized from the inside-out, especially in cases of air and gas inflation.

I don’t have much more to offer beside that; but I hope this offers some insight for you about what exactly it is I personally like so much about it.

Thank you for reading my post today! If you enjoyed it, you may also be interested in my erotica or even a commission.

Expanding The Market Horizons…

So as you may be aware I recently held a sale over on Amazon and at the time I indicated that it’s unlikely I would hold one again in the future.

This is because I had my titles previously enrolled in KDP Select. If you’re not familiar, this basically just means that my ebooks were exclusive to the Kindle platform. I did this simply for ease and efficiency.

One of the problems I fell into was not consistently publishing though; as you can see, I currently only have five titles published. There are more on the way but I have not been good about writing consistently because I manage two other mainstream pennames, all with inconsistent results.

However, I’ve decided to pull my titles from KDP Select so I can go wide on the market which would make the stories much more accessible to you as a reader. Here are some things I have brewing in order of priority:

  • Launching current and future titles on Smashwords and/or Draft2Digital for wide distribution
  • Publishing a new title or installment every other week until I reach a specific goal
  • Upgrading my website to include an ebookstore
  • Launching a Patreon

I don’t have the audience yet to really justify the site upgrade (a few hundred dollars) or the Patreon but it’s a goal for later this year or sometime next.

In mid-June, when my KDP Select obligations expire, there will be a lot more coming forth on that front!

All of my eBooks are on sale or FREE!

Now through May 27, you can get Once Around the Sun for FREE
and other titles are $.99 – $1.99!

As summer approaches, I will be expanding my market, releasing many more titles, and really annoying the crap out of you with the express purpose of giving you something to read in bed every single night of the year. It’s unlikely I will host an Amazon sale anytime soon. Take this opportunity now while you can!

Once Around the Sun is one of my favorite things I’ve written, ever. I’m genuinely delighted to be able to share it with you. No matter what type of feedist content you like, I’m sure at least one part of it will tickle your fancy. It’s romantic, steamy, lush, and delicious!

Here is a little taste:

Hands deftly unsnapped the front clasp on a brand-new bra. I tried not to make crude comparisons to overripe melons or water balloons in my mind but the way my breasts undulated under my shirt—now a full cup size larger—left little else to the imagination.

“You take my breath away.”

Protests and accusations died on my lips as you massaged and tweaked me in all the right spots—the ones you had come to learn in intimate detail since the last vernal equinox. Spots that had become more sensitive. Ones you paid the most attention to the nights after the takeout binges, when I was stuffed to the brim and yearning for your touch.

“But don’t you love it, though?” Your hand that thumbed my rock-hard nipples slipped behind my back and snagged my loose wrists. Your other hand curled protectively around my waist. With my back and shoulders straightened in your grasp, my midsection puffed around your arm, long and thin. “I think you do. Don’t you want some more?”

Not quite your taste? Here’s a bite from Stuffing Season 1:

Another lump of peanut-buttery-milky-chocolately goo squeezed past my cheeks. My stomach gurgled as it accommodated just a little more. I closed my eyes and prayed to Venus to release me so I could concentrate. 

Delicate hands slipped the vibrator inside me and flicked it on. The pulses reverberated through my core, creating a quake in my belly. Dee placed her other hand flat on my stomach, half-kneeled on the bed. Despite her petite frame, she squared her shoulders and stood tall.

The contents of my stomach, its tightness, and the vibrator were too much. Too much! I moaned and cried as the last of the chocolate slid down my throat. With her hand resting on me, the device below bouncing around inside, and the food cramming my face—I was packed solid, to the absolute brim. 

And I had never felt so turned on in my life. 

I wanted more.

A satisfying pop sounded when Dee removed the tube a moment later. 

“Dee,” I panted. “Please. I’m going to explode.”

She smirked. “Interesting choice of words. But, soon. I need an answer from you first.”

I shook my head and worked my jaw, stretching it from its excessive use. Clearing some of the fog from my mind—in vain. “An answer about what?”

And if you like it so much you want something special for yourself, I am available for commission!

The Correct Word is “Feedism.”

Don’t mind me, just rolling through with a bite for you to think about when it comes to discussing this kink.

Many people erroneously call it feederism, but if I may, please reconsider shortening to feedism.

Feederism refers to only one half of the dynamic and eliminates the other very important part: feedees. It erases them from the discussion, when the kink wouldn’t exist at all without them! Can’t feed someone if there isn’t a willing partner to receive it, right?

Additionally, referring to it as feederism implies that there is a hierarchy and that feeders are the authority or the norm. In reality, just as feedism can’t exist without feedees, nor can it exist without feeders—but one is not more important than the other.

All feeders are feedists. All feedees are feedists. The entire bubble wrapped up is feedism.

That’s all, thank you, carry on!